By Coralie Darsey-Malloy
Whatever you assume to be true..
will become real for you.
--Dr. Robert Anthony
The work we do could be loosely defined by a workshop David and I first presented in 1991 called.. “Change Your Beliefs…Change Your Life.” We developed it on the basis that what you become what you believe…not what you wish for, want or dream about…but what you truly believe! One of the ideas we present to clients is that if they don’t change their beliefs their life might remain the same forever. Then comes a hard truth to confront; is that good …or bad news?
After years of training in the human potential movement and self-development field we consistently see how beliefs move us forward …or hold us back. It is something David and I continually evaluate both personally and professionally. After experiencing many transformational changes we have committed our lives to assisting others. We offer techniques that improve the quality of their lives so they can also discover inner peace, balance, order and harmony rather than continuing in patterns of struggle, strife and pain.
It has become more commonly understood that people move towards whatever they picture in their minds…and believe to be ‘true’ whether it makes sense to anyone else or not. Our position is this; if the image works then by all means keep doing and believing it. However, when unwanted circumstances keep repeating it may be time to pause and ask why. So often people lament and cry out in anguish; “Why is this happening to me AGAIN!” In our observation they often spend time in evaluations, assessments, criticisms, judgments, opinions, convictions, laws, rules, procedures, schemes and of course making up their minds! Once their minds are made up and a set of beliefs are formed there is usually a loud clunk, it is the sound of their minds closing shut.
With those individuals we have found the best way to approach things is to either let them be…or use my husband’s skydiving analogy that the mind is like a parachute…it works best when open. The more we open our minds the more we learn. Even if we’re not doing it ‘right’ there is still a lesson there…how not to do it the next time! Thoughts and beliefs shape behaviors, words actions and circumstances but do not make people what they are. However, they do reveal who they have chosen to be up to that point. There is an undeniable reality that we continually act upon our thoughts and those actions create our experiences. For some the challenge to take complete responsibility for the consequences of their choices making is a difficult process. Many refuse to acknowledge that the only real limits are created through self-limiting attitudes and behaviors.
Within the human condition it is often easier to blame others for where they are. However, as awareness develops it becomes easier to understand and accept that we are the writer, director, and producer of the ideas, and images that become belief systems. No one can have a feeling without first having a thought.
Behavior is based upon feelings and they affect thoughts and beliefs. With our approach we do not focus on changing behavior…but suggest changing thought patterns and take an ‘inside out’ approach rather than the other way around. To some it may sound somewhat simplistic…but there are growing bodies of evidence that when we change beliefs life changes and usually for the better! Carl Jung put it this way; “Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside dreams…who looks inside…awakens! I could not agree more. It is the reason I wrote my testimony of hope...because as I changed my beliefs..it changed my life and it can work for you too!
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